Surrender? Yes — “What is demanded of man is not, as some existential philosophers teach, to endure the meaninglessness of life, but rather to bear his incapacity to grasp its unconditional meaninglessness in rational terms.” — sage Viktor Frankl

 
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So, how do ruined people pick up and move on again toward a thriving, grateful life?   The first order of business is surrender. We stop railing against the harm.  Somewhere inside of ourselves, we make an authentic peace with the fact that no one is immune to harm. We decide to deeply believe that we waste our lives insisting every scale must be balanced before we are free.
 
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Second, in some cases, we walk away from the fight. Yes, we give up. We acknowledge that our naysayer self-important detractor has won and move on to other work, other opportunities to give life a chance.
 
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And third, we decide that no one has the power to make life anything less than good.  You might call this decision a decision of Faith.  I am a seminarian and minister by backdrop.
 
 
 
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https://curtisnarimatsu.wordpress.com/2012/12/04/himno-al-amor-in-tribute-to-the-great-corina-harry/

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tWlrLYn16Oo

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My personal trinity to bear my incapacity to grasp life’s unconditional meaninglessness in a rational way.

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“What is demanded of man is not, as some existential philosophers teach, to endure the meaninglessness of life, but rather to bear his incapacity to grasp its unconditional meaninglessness in rational terms.”
Viktor E. Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning
 
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No matter that my praise of others is unrequited  – I shall not hold back — I owe authenticity  to myself to express and to love — simply via my own self-respect — to love and hopefully to be loved.    

But true love is different from   needless suffering   for the rest of one’s life.

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At the end of the day, we have to grow a self-respect sufficient not to want someone who doesn’t want us, hard as it is to implement.

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http://www.lvrj.com/view/love-can-endure-if-people-work-through-lost-relationships-144330465.html

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A Van Gogh saw reality so deeply and clearly, yet could not ultimately disconnect his heart [“be not of this world” — self-respect despite this indifferent and tragic sentient life] from this abject reality or the other people in it.

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And in this gap were a crushing emptiness and an aloneness that can make you lose your mind and a sadness that can make your heart question the wisdom and the relevance of continuing to beat — a sadness no person can bear alone. Van Gogh died because, in the end, he could not differentiate himself [self-respect] from the Collective Unconscious [our indifferent & tragic lack of empathy/compassion in our broken/flawed sentient nature] into which he was compelled to wander.     

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http://www.lvrj.com/living/54285947.html

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https://curtisnarimatsu.wordpress.com/2012/11/13/van-gogh-the-wisdom-and-soul-of-the-ways-of-our-cherished-old-but-do-not-kill-yourself-like-he-did/

 

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music is my magical peace symbol   –   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YVF9RR56rVg&feature=BFa&list=UUKFU_o4qqRS__FEaQVE0JcA

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“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.”   — Mark Twain     http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/11/30/mark-twain-quotes_n_2213697.html?utm_hp_ref=books#slide=1820214
 
 
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http://www.huffingtonpost.com/tara-brach/love-healing_b_2192030.html?utm_hp_ref=gps-for-the-soul&ir=GPS%20for%20the%20Soul

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http://www.huffingtonpost.com/terri-cole/volunteering-health_b_2189477.html?utm_hp_ref=gps-for-the-soul&ir=GPS%20for%20the%20Soul

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http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lisa-firestone/generosity-benefits_b_2168059.html

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Hard as it is to do, I try to integrate and embrace life’s unlovely events and turn them into redemption, humility, creativity, gratitude, and commitments to live with love and meaning.     I try to embrace compassion and empathy in service to others and both to large and small creatures.   Many people discover meaning in suffering as they work to integrate their suffering in service to the world.

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http://www.lvrj.com/living/lifes-journey-includes-pain-of-suffering-69506497.html

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https://curtisnarimatsu.wordpress.com/2012/11/17/all-those-moments-of-life-will-be-lost-in-time-like-tears-in-the-rain-time-to-for-me-time-to-deal-with-myself-alone/

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YfRyBo6Yi50&feature=BFa&list=UUKFU_o4qqRS__FEaQVE0JcA

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I take the pain of being forsaken – I do not wish such pain on anyone else   –

Turn suffering to witness.

Sometimes we suffer as a testimony against overpride/vanity/envy/jealousy/anger/etc.  We  suffer as a way of absorbing the cost of hatred and bearing witness against the insanity of revenge.

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http://www.lvrj.com/living/lifes-journey-includes-pain-of-suffering-69506497.html

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kMwgJb3OzwY&feature=BFa&list=UUKFU_o4qqRS__FEaQVE0JcA

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fg52C1828lI&feature=BFa&list=UUKFU_o4qqRS__FEaQVE0JcA

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thus ends my personal trinity above.

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When your leadership is needed, you will give it.    Give, and it shall be given.      Aside from the all-omnipotent empathy and secular concern for other living creatures and everything on this earth, Christian charity is that God makes no difficulty in giving that which Eternal Truth  promises to restore.  “Let us give for the sake of God.”   There is none but God who receives no advantage from His  gifts, and because He engages himself to pay these debts of His creatures with  an excessive interest of Grace and Atonement.     http://bible.cc/luke/6-38.htm       

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Power comes where it goes — with God’s Beneficence [LBJ quip — LBJ created power banks in LBJ’s varied roles on Capitol Hill].   Treasures especially in earthen vessels.    http://bible.cc/2_corinthians/4-7.htm 

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Shakespeare called it in/well  — personality is the key ingredient in all relationships and outcomes.     Daniel 5:13-17 

http://www.ankerberg.com/Articles/_PDFArchives/practical-christianity/PC1W1206.pdf       

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Power does not corrupt a priori ipso facto.     Power reveals — good [Biblical Joseph] and bad [Biblical Judas Iscariot].    Money is not the root of all evil.   The love of money over one’s salvation is the root of all evil.  1 Timothy 6:10

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  http://bible.cc/1_timothy/6-10.htm  

      

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http://www.lvrj.com/living/theology-differs-but-we-mesh-on-truths-of-human-finitude-152194005.html

 
 
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Great sage Steven Kalas born 1957 on dealing with psychic/energy vampires   –

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http://www.lvrj.com/view/mom-s-changing-stories-about-money-cause-hurt-confusion-138834794.html

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tightrope dichotomy of trying to be The Observer (detached, staying objective) yet still having the very real human experience of being “driven crazy.”

It is personal when we are conscripted into someone’s crisis of fear and smallness. It is personal to be deliberately moved about the game board of someone’s life as if we were no more than a lesser chess piece in the contest of ego-defense [fear] and self-importance/arrogance [smallness].

It hurts to be treated as a means to an end. The hurt is a sign of our health — our self-respect — not a sign that anything about us needs to be fixed.

And yet … it is equally a sign of self-respect that we make an effort to be The Observer. We do this, too, because we love. Despite our hurt and disappointment, we want to try to understand, to attempt to answer the question of what’s really going on here.

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Yes, Stephen Hawking & atheists correctly say that we have only one chance  — our mortal lives — to make a difference for the better for all living things.   Correctly make the best of it.   

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And that if we happen to be martyrs/exemplars [e.g. Holocaust victims] for the good side of humanity by being disincentives to human barbarism/savagery, at least we take comfort in manifesting the olive branch to avert recurrence of the evil/indifference/selfishness inherent in us all  [olive branch being creation of State of Israel].  

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Life also is a challenge regardless of our evil human condition  –  nature’s calamities beset us all on this earth  — so that Hawking & atheists correctly say to minimize the risks of injury/death via our inherent good cognition and to tough it out as best as we can.    Such risks are facts of life, so to speak.   

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I like my alltime hero Steven Kalas’ soothing thoughts   – 

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Mercy is a sublime human virtue. Becoming human means putting a bridle on the animal instinct to attack vulnerability. It means that, when our antagonist has dropped his sword and shield, bows before us and asks for another chance, we give a “thumbs up.” We allow sincere remorse to gentle us instead of provoke us to increased aggression

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http://www.lvrj.com/living/by-accepting-i-m-sorry-we-show-our-sublime-humanity-136899918.html

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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anxiety#Existential_anxiety

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The tone of Man’s Search for Meaning is like this throughout: the reasonable, detached observer describing not only the radical evil around him but radical absurdity, stripped of everything “except, literally, our naked existence.” The effect is to connect life at Auschwitz with life anywhere.

We needed to stop asking ourselves about the meaning of life, and instead to think of ourselves as those who were being questioned by life –  daily and hourly. . . . Therefore, it was necessary for us to face up to the full amount of suffering, trying to keep moments of weakness and furtive tears to a minimum. But there was no need to be ashamed of tears, for tears bore witness that a man had the greatest of courage –

THE COURAGE TO SUFFER.

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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Man%27s_Search_for_Meaning#Experiences_in_a_concentration_camp

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Frankl concludes from his experience that a prisoner’s psychological reactions are not solely the result of the conditions of his life,

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but also from the freedom of choice he always has even in severe suffering.

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The inner hold a prisoner has on his spiritual self relies on having a hope in the future, and that once a prisoner loses that hope,

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he is doomed!!!

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According to Viktor Frankl, the author of Man’s Search for Meaning, when a person is faced with extreme mortal dangers, the most basic of all human wishes is to find a meaning of life to combat the    ”trauma of nonbeing“     as death is near.

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Assembly of God pulpiteer and former Wales native Robert Owen born 1924 loves camaraderie at my expense of a costly steak meal for free for him.   Yet, his humongous mountain of an ego even surpasses his gluttony and most crucially the rock mountain which my great hero super-sandaled Biblical Caleb overcame as testament to Caleb’s Faith in God.
 
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“Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.”  2 Corinthians 12:10 
 
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Pastor Robert Owen brazenly is so full of himself [pundit Earl Dean Edmoundson’s peer/preacher] .   Pastor Robert Owen  [like Guenni Jack Mormon born March 1952] misses Biblical Caleb’s point — God Almighty, not Robert Owen Almighty.
 
 
 
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Pastor Robert Owen is King Sisyphus  –
 
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As a punishment from the gods for his trickery King Sisyphus was made to roll a huge boulder up a steep hill. Before he could reach the top, however, the massive stone would always roll back down, forcing him to begin again. The maddening nature of the punishment was reserved for King Sisyphus due to his hubristic belief that his cleverness surpassed that of Zeus Himself.   Zeus accordingly displayed his own cleverness by consigning Sisyphus to an eternity of useless efforts and unending frustration. Thus it came to pass that pointless and/or interminable activities are sometimes described as Sisyphean.
 
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Especially those who come from our outer social margins enormously and beautifully exude that there is more than enough love to go around, that empathy/compassion/beneficence/trust/hope/gratitude/humility are God’s felt necessities.   Sharing is as natural as breathing.   Second nature.  
 
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To the person giving of oneself,  such person has another wondrous opportunity to become even more self-fulfilled,  as the receiver derives benefit/sustenance/love.   I have experienced personally the magnanimity of altruists on the edges of society who give so unconditionally of themselves and of their meager austere possessions.     And the incredulity of abject parsimony on the part of our patricians/pharisees so utterly ”full of themselves”/mammon such as pulpiteer Robert Owen.    Huli’au/upside down [confounds one’s sense of love/compassion]!!    
 
 
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Dearest kindred soul Pi’ehu Iaukea 1855-1940 impels upon us all that love/patience/kindness/humbleness/generosity of spirit do not and never should have social boundaries.
 
 
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Great religious figures invoke the most important precepts, especially amid our trials & tribulations.   As tremendous observer Steven Kalas born 1957 chastens,  we bear with suffering by finding meaning in it, as we turn suffering into transformative good in the world.   Sublime Grace [for religious folks   —  uplift from God].

 
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http://www.lvrj.com/living/appropriate-self-respect-can-lift-all-areas-of-life-118320899.html

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My passion also is theological. In my religious heritage, the baptismal vows come to this crescendo: Celebrant: “Will you respect the dignity of every human being?” People: “I will, with God’s help.” It always nails my soul to the floor. Respect, from the Latin respectus, meaning “to see again.” Dignity, from the Latin digne, meaning “the breath of God.” In other words, if you’re breathing, that’s the only credential you need to rightly claim that I treat you respectfully.

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Self-respect fundamentally changes our motives for living our values. Take fidelity in marriage, for example. There are a wide variety of motives we might deploy as we live out the promise of not having sex with folks other than our spouse. We might want to be “good.” We might see fidelity as the necessary sacrifice required to derive the benefits of marriage. Commonly, we understand fidelity as a promise made to our spouse, and therefore a gift to the spouse: “Isn’t this nice of me, honey, not to have sex with other people?”

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But, watch what happens when you take your motives for fidelity and “rewire” them to self-respect. Suddenly, fidelity is not first a promise made to your mate; rather, a promise made to yourself. It’s not first a gift to your mate, but a gift to oneself.

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It makes you into the husband/wife you most respect. Suddenly, living your values becomes strangely mercenary, and, I would argue, eminently more powerful.

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A warning:   there’s a downside, a real tricky balance in the work of self-respect. I have learned to nurture a healthy suspicion when I become too strident, too righteous about that value.

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There’s a line between self-respect and self-important/arrogant pride. It’s a fine line. Easy to cross. Way too easy for me, anyway. And I cross it at my own peril.

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When the human ego conscripts the language, the work and the mantle of self-respect, you start to feel really good and right about discarding people from your life.

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And then you can know that you were right, because you don’t have any friends at all.

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Self-respect and self-importance — not the same at all. But they can feel the same.

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Why can’t I be like you or in sync with you?    Because then there would be no need for a me, just you and you alone.

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Life boils down to attitude     –

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http://www.utsandiego.com/news/2010/aug/26/300-foot-tall-statue-in-san-diegos-future/

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Artist Gary Lee Price works on a prototype of “The Statue of Responsibility.”  - Kenneth Linge

Artist Gary Lee Price works on a 13-foot-tall clay prototype of the Statue of Responsibility, which he designed.

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“I wanted to give credence to Viktor E. Frankl’s idea by creating two human elements coming together,  assisting in the shared responsibility of maintaining freedom,” said sculptor Price.

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“We are accountable, and the bottom line boils down to us.”      — Gary Lee Price

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33 Responses to Surrender? Yes — “What is demanded of man is not, as some existential philosophers teach, to endure the meaninglessness of life, but rather to bear his incapacity to grasp its unconditional meaninglessness in rational terms.” — sage Viktor Frankl

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