Men who can’t cry are the most fragile men I’ve ever known. Whereas depressed men often are sitting on grief, I find that depressed women are sitting on anger. Anger they can’t or won’t “own.” A woman’s rejection of anger often is argued as “I don’t want to hurt people,” or “It’s not a loving way to treat people.” These women are afraid of hurting, that is, not being loving to the people with whom they are angry. But I’m here to tell you the exact opposite is true. An angry woman who does not yet know she is angry must hurt you. Grief and anger are the names of two crucial intimacies. Until we are willing to be intimate with those emotions in ourselves, we will always be impeded in our ability to be intimate with others. — Steven Kalas

 

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Men are just as likely to be depressed as women, as study has found, but their symptoms may be disparate.

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http://www.reviewjournal.com/steven-kalas/grief-anger-cause-no-end-trouble

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http://life.nationalpost.com/2013/08/29/men-just-as-likely-to-suffer-from-depression-as-women-they-just-show-it-differently-study-finds/

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http://www.latimes.com/science/la-sci-depression-men-20130829,0,2605342.story

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Men as likely to suffer from depression as women – they just show it differently, study finds

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Our findings showed that men are willing to endorse the alternative depression symptoms, leading to the elimination of sex differences in the prevalence of depression.

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The findings help unravel a mystery for mental health authorities:   If men are so much less likely than women to be depressed, why are men four times more likely to commit suicide?

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The first scale tested common symptoms used to diagnose depression, such as feeling sadness and/or guilt or worthlessness, reduced interest in once enjoyable activities, and insomnia. The second scale tested symptoms such as aggression, irritability, anger, taking risks, hyperactivity, and substance abuse — symptoms that are now thought to be more typically how men exhibit depression.

The results for the first, gender-neutral scale showed that 30.6% of male respondents and 33.3% of female respondents had been depressed at least one time in their life, while 26.3% of male and 21.9% of female participants answered the same for the second scale that included the new symptoms. Since the second scale showed a larger disparity between men and women, this proved to the researchers that men are just as likely as women to suffer from depression – but that signals of the condition might be different.

“These results suggest that relying only on men’s disclosure of traditional symptoms could lead to an underdiagnosis of depression in men and that clinicians should consider other clues when assessing depression in men,” the study’s lead authors wrote.

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The second scale with the new symptoms was based on the Gotland Male Depression Scale, first conceived of in Sweden for research on suicide, and tested on a sample of a group of men who had substance abuse problems.

This study is significant as women are twice as likely than men to be diagnosed with depression. It shows that while both genders experience depression, the symptoms of the condition can be gender-specific. The study’s authors did note, however, that women can and do experience the symptoms such as anger and irritability that are now thought to be markers of depression in men.

“Ultimately, the results of this work have the potential to bring significant advances to the field in terms of the perception and measurement of depression,” the study’s authors concluded. “These findings could lead to important changes in the way depression is conceptualized and measured. Our findings showed that men are willing to endorse the alternative depression symptoms, leading to the elimination of sex differences in the prevalence of depression.”

 

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6 Responses to Men who can’t cry are the most fragile men I’ve ever known. Whereas depressed men often are sitting on grief, I find that depressed women are sitting on anger. Anger they can’t or won’t “own.” A woman’s rejection of anger often is argued as “I don’t want to hurt people,” or “It’s not a loving way to treat people.” These women are afraid of hurting, that is, not being loving to the people with whom they are angry. But I’m here to tell you the exact opposite is true. An angry woman who does not yet know she is angry must hurt you. Grief and anger are the names of two crucial intimacies. Until we are willing to be intimate with those emotions in ourselves, we will always be impeded in our ability to be intimate with others. — Steven Kalas

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